So, being behind has become a way of life around here. We miss the regular stuff like pulling weeds in the bakcyard and doing laundry so that we can play outside with "the street friends" and their parents. Usually it's not a big deal, except that my job is becoming a big deal, and so normal stuff keeps getting pushed further back.
Sir Toots has a birthday this week...he turns 6...and I haven't booked his party yet. He's at the age where what/where/who are very important and he wants to go roller skating. The closest rink to us is 30 minutes away. How do I manage to pull it together and get kiddos to the rink and then back home? I have no idea...so I've been pushing it off. Doesn't solve the problem, really. And now, I have to plan it and pull it all together in the next 24 hours. This is the joy of parenthood, right?
On a lighter note...we've started golfing. The four of us went to the driving range today and had a blast. I started lessons this morning and found out that I have a pretty decent swing. Sweet Center loves the idea of playing golf. I was told by my pro this morning that I need to pass my clubs along to Sweet Center pretty soon. Evidently a bargain set from the local golf shop isn't going to get me very far. Better suited a Jr. Golfer. Dude, that's Sweet Center. Can't believe he's at the age where he wants to look at golf stuff when we go to the store.
And The Boys start their outdoor camp tomorrow. Canoes, bb rifles, and arrows out the wazoo. They'll be exhausted! Fun!
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
and now, a word from our sponsor
Things have stabilized for Hubba Hubba now that he's got his dosage in line. He's remembering to take it every night and the results have been nothing short of astounding, really. We spent the weekend cleaning out the garage so he could have a place for his car stuff and I could have my own gardening area. No really, he's taken to tinkering with his Saab and I've got a plant or two that I haven't managed to kill. It's amazing around here, I tell ya!
As for therapy, we're trying to stay focused on why we went there in the first place. Long term things, like communication. It is the hardest thing for us these days. Really weird, because that's always been our strong suit. We still talk, now we're just trying to make sure that when I talk he doesn't hear the shrill pitch of a flightless bird. and to make sure that I hear more than a chirp out of him. Keeping it balanced, you know? It's coming and at the end of the day we still like to cuddle up and read together. So, we still have that going for us, which is a nice reminder of what we're trying to achieve.
The Boys attended Scout Camp last week. Sir Toots is still considered a Papoose, so he was corraled off under a tent and played random games for the duration of the evening. Sweet Center got to shoot a bb gun and do a bit of archery. Total fun on his side of the camp. Fortunately Sir Toots turns 6 this month and magically boys are able to grasp the complexities associated with learning fairness and doing a good turn. Can't handle that kind of pressure at 5, evidently.
As for therapy, we're trying to stay focused on why we went there in the first place. Long term things, like communication. It is the hardest thing for us these days. Really weird, because that's always been our strong suit. We still talk, now we're just trying to make sure that when I talk he doesn't hear the shrill pitch of a flightless bird. and to make sure that I hear more than a chirp out of him. Keeping it balanced, you know? It's coming and at the end of the day we still like to cuddle up and read together. So, we still have that going for us, which is a nice reminder of what we're trying to achieve.
The Boys attended Scout Camp last week. Sir Toots is still considered a Papoose, so he was corraled off under a tent and played random games for the duration of the evening. Sweet Center got to shoot a bb gun and do a bit of archery. Total fun on his side of the camp. Fortunately Sir Toots turns 6 this month and magically boys are able to grasp the complexities associated with learning fairness and doing a good turn. Can't handle that kind of pressure at 5, evidently.
Friday, June 06, 2008
Looks Like We Made It
We made it! Sir Toots moves on to first grade and Sweet Center breezed on to fifth grade. Oh, Happy Day!!
So, we're heading down I35 to find some fun in San Antonio!!
A day with Shamu and then on to meet Sweet Center's favorite author, Rick Riordan, in Austin on Sunday.
Wish us luck! And JOY! We're really holding out for pure unadultered JOY!!
So, we're heading down I35 to find some fun in San Antonio!!
A day with Shamu and then on to meet Sweet Center's favorite author, Rick Riordan, in Austin on Sunday.
Wish us luck! And JOY! We're really holding out for pure unadultered JOY!!
Monday, June 02, 2008
The Sound of Silence
I once had a therapist that told me I was an "experienced consumer" in the middle of our first session. I'm sure she meant it in the nicest way...like, "Wow, you really know you're stuff...You must have sat on a couch a time or two before!" It makes me smile because I am known as the "Quirky One" on our street. When The Girls get together for margarita's I'm the first to tell a story just to get the conversation rolling.....Why is that?
Anyway, this all makes me a Quirky-Experienced-Therapy-Consumer. So, a couple of months ago when Hubba Hubba and I were struggling with balancing our life, I headed straight to a therapist. She was kind and chuckled at my jokes. You know, the ones I make when I'm uncomfortable and want to smooth out the rough edges of my conversation. On my third visit, she looks at me and said that we weren't going to make any progress unless Hubba Hubba came in with me.
So, being the brave soul that he is, he joined me on the couch. And then it got interesting. During our second joint session, as I'm the only one answering her questions, she just keeps looking at Hubba Hubba. Like the person I had been describing to her could NOT be the man sitting next to me. No way. He looks normal. He doesn't look like a man who heads to bed whenever the mood strikes him- for several hours at a time. He doesn't look like the kind of guy who can so wrapped up in Guitar Hero with our 13 year old neighbor that he loses all track of time (and reality). Sitting there wearing his tie straight from the corporate world, he looks exactly what you would expect a happily married suburban daddy-o to look like. Except, she notices he isn't talking.
And I know what you're thinking, how can he? You do so much talking that the poor man has just learned the survival skill of lethal acquiesence. But, really I'm working on that. And I have learned the "5 second rule." I speak and then wait 5 seconds for him to respond. Except, he doesn't. And the silence has slowly been breaking my heart. When I ask a question, the only response was silence. Total and utter silence. Like it was too much for him to engage. Too much effort. Too much.
So, we ended up on the couch. In front of this woman who just wants to figure out how to help us, when her preconceived ideas about our marriage didn't live up to the reality of the two of us sitting there. She looks him in the eye and asks, "How long have you been depressed?"
Sizzle. This woman wasn't going to play games. She adjusted her concept of us to match the reality and nailed it.
She asked him when the last time was that he really felt joy. Any kind of joy in any kind of activity. His answer was slow and opened a little hole in my heart. "I don't know."
The earth was still spinning, but I felt like the ticketmaster forgot to give me my ticket to jump on the merry-go-round. I didn't like this. I didn't want to think that there was anything wrong with him. Can't you just give us a sample dialogue or something to work on at home? Something simple?
No. There's nothing simple about depression. It's pervasive and poisinous. It will slowly eat you alive. or take away your joy. One small chip at a time.
So, it's up to Hubba Hubba to learn how to correct this course. It's up to him to decide what kind of treatment he wants to pursue. Because he has to. I won't let him sit on the sidelines of our life. He has to be on this merry-go-round with me, dammit. For better or worse, we signed up and paid for our tickets. We have the Boys who need engaged parents.
They need to see that sometimes life is hard, and depression is real, but you deal with what you got and where you are to make the most of this life. You learn to live your joy. and demand it back when it's being taken from you.
Anyway, this all makes me a Quirky-Experienced-Therapy-Consumer. So, a couple of months ago when Hubba Hubba and I were struggling with balancing our life, I headed straight to a therapist. She was kind and chuckled at my jokes. You know, the ones I make when I'm uncomfortable and want to smooth out the rough edges of my conversation. On my third visit, she looks at me and said that we weren't going to make any progress unless Hubba Hubba came in with me.
So, being the brave soul that he is, he joined me on the couch. And then it got interesting. During our second joint session, as I'm the only one answering her questions, she just keeps looking at Hubba Hubba. Like the person I had been describing to her could NOT be the man sitting next to me. No way. He looks normal. He doesn't look like a man who heads to bed whenever the mood strikes him- for several hours at a time. He doesn't look like the kind of guy who can so wrapped up in Guitar Hero with our 13 year old neighbor that he loses all track of time (and reality). Sitting there wearing his tie straight from the corporate world, he looks exactly what you would expect a happily married suburban daddy-o to look like. Except, she notices he isn't talking.
And I know what you're thinking, how can he? You do so much talking that the poor man has just learned the survival skill of lethal acquiesence. But, really I'm working on that. And I have learned the "5 second rule." I speak and then wait 5 seconds for him to respond. Except, he doesn't. And the silence has slowly been breaking my heart. When I ask a question, the only response was silence. Total and utter silence. Like it was too much for him to engage. Too much effort. Too much.
So, we ended up on the couch. In front of this woman who just wants to figure out how to help us, when her preconceived ideas about our marriage didn't live up to the reality of the two of us sitting there. She looks him in the eye and asks, "How long have you been depressed?"
Sizzle. This woman wasn't going to play games. She adjusted her concept of us to match the reality and nailed it.
She asked him when the last time was that he really felt joy. Any kind of joy in any kind of activity. His answer was slow and opened a little hole in my heart. "I don't know."
The earth was still spinning, but I felt like the ticketmaster forgot to give me my ticket to jump on the merry-go-round. I didn't like this. I didn't want to think that there was anything wrong with him. Can't you just give us a sample dialogue or something to work on at home? Something simple?
No. There's nothing simple about depression. It's pervasive and poisinous. It will slowly eat you alive. or take away your joy. One small chip at a time.
So, it's up to Hubba Hubba to learn how to correct this course. It's up to him to decide what kind of treatment he wants to pursue. Because he has to. I won't let him sit on the sidelines of our life. He has to be on this merry-go-round with me, dammit. For better or worse, we signed up and paid for our tickets. We have the Boys who need engaged parents.
They need to see that sometimes life is hard, and depression is real, but you deal with what you got and where you are to make the most of this life. You learn to live your joy. and demand it back when it's being taken from you.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Forget
I so love this...the message is amazing....Look forward and don't carry yesterday with you. It's about this momemt. This momemt. Yes, this momemt. See the big picture and enjoy the journey, but don't expect yourself to carry yesterday's burdens along with todays joys.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Regret nothing. Not even the sins and failures. When a man views earth's wonders from some mountain height he does not spend his time in dwelling on the stones and stumbles, the faints and failures, that marked his upward path.
So with you. Breathe in the rich blessings of each new day - forget all that lies behind you.
Man is so made that he can carry the weight of twenty-four hours, no more. Directly he weighs down with the years behind, and the days ahead, his back breaks. I have promised to help you with the burden of today only, the past I have taken from you and if you, foolish hearts, choose to gather again that burden and bear it, then, indeed, you mock Me to expect Me to share it.
For weal or woe each day is ended. What remains to be lived, the coming twenty-four hours, you must face as you awake.
A man on a march on earth carries only what he needs for that march. Would you pity him if you saw him bearing too the overwhelming weight of the worn-out shoes and uniforms of past marches and years? And yet, in the mental and spiritual life, man does these things. Small wonder My poor world is heartsick and weary.
Not so must you act.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
May it be so with you. Act on today and enjoy the journey with todays blessings.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Regret nothing. Not even the sins and failures. When a man views earth's wonders from some mountain height he does not spend his time in dwelling on the stones and stumbles, the faints and failures, that marked his upward path.
So with you. Breathe in the rich blessings of each new day - forget all that lies behind you.
Man is so made that he can carry the weight of twenty-four hours, no more. Directly he weighs down with the years behind, and the days ahead, his back breaks. I have promised to help you with the burden of today only, the past I have taken from you and if you, foolish hearts, choose to gather again that burden and bear it, then, indeed, you mock Me to expect Me to share it.
For weal or woe each day is ended. What remains to be lived, the coming twenty-four hours, you must face as you awake.
A man on a march on earth carries only what he needs for that march. Would you pity him if you saw him bearing too the overwhelming weight of the worn-out shoes and uniforms of past marches and years? And yet, in the mental and spiritual life, man does these things. Small wonder My poor world is heartsick and weary.
Not so must you act.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
May it be so with you. Act on today and enjoy the journey with todays blessings.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Dear Sweet Center,
Sometimes the answer just is "because I said so" and really really arguing with me won't change that. Taking your DS to bed is not a good idea and the only thing I can tell you is that I'm trying to help you sleep. Not get all amped up before I have to come in and force lights out. If I give in and let you play one video game at bedtime, then when it's really time for lights out, you'll just try and argue with me some more. I've learned (oh, yes, I've learned a thing or two from you) that sometimes giving someone a reason "why" just means giving them a ammunition to continue pushing their own argument, regardless of the merit of that argument. It's like this winding circle that you insist upon twisting around our discussion. Man, you're gonna make a killer lawyer or used car sales man someday.
I'm tired, you're tired. Let's just kiss and hug and agree to disagree.
Love, Mama
Sometimes the answer just is "because I said so" and really really arguing with me won't change that. Taking your DS to bed is not a good idea and the only thing I can tell you is that I'm trying to help you sleep. Not get all amped up before I have to come in and force lights out. If I give in and let you play one video game at bedtime, then when it's really time for lights out, you'll just try and argue with me some more. I've learned (oh, yes, I've learned a thing or two from you) that sometimes giving someone a reason "why" just means giving them a ammunition to continue pushing their own argument, regardless of the merit of that argument. It's like this winding circle that you insist upon twisting around our discussion. Man, you're gonna make a killer lawyer or used car sales man someday.
I'm tired, you're tired. Let's just kiss and hug and agree to disagree.
Love, Mama
holy crap! I just realized that the computer that was accidently left on the front porch and then got wet when the sprinkler system went off (at the wrong time!) had all our photos on it...oh man....these were the photos from the last year with our trips and just random pictures of the family.
Dammit.
Dammit.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Here comes the sun...
sooo....how've you been? We've been trying to push on and make it through to summer. Summer. That sweet time of year that doesn't require a last minute drill of backpacks and hair inspections (did you REALLY wash? with soap?) to get in line and wait to drop the little buggers off so that their brains can get full. Yes, they'll go to camp and are very excited about the possibilities of learning to row a booat and shoot a bb gun. I'm not kidding! I really paid for them to learn these things. They'll have fun under adult supervision for 3 long months.
Now, if we can just make it through the next 8 days. 2 weeks of school left and we had to meet with Sir Toot's teacher this past week. Seems he's not interested in completing his assignments during the alloted time. So, he's ending in up in Study Hall. Yes, in kindergarten. And then, if he still isn't done, then he ends up in the hallway outside the principal's office. Believe me, when we went in to school early for our conference, he actually asked we wanted a tour of the office. Very familiar territory for him, apparently.
Anyway, we're pushing him through and hoping that we can make it 8 more days. Hubba Hubba and I decided it was time to bribe him. He's working on earning a Nintendo DS. His assignemnts aren't hard and they aren't time consuming. He just needs to do them when he's supposed to....and not end up outside the principal's office.
Now, if we can just make it through the next 8 days. 2 weeks of school left and we had to meet with Sir Toot's teacher this past week. Seems he's not interested in completing his assignments during the alloted time. So, he's ending in up in Study Hall. Yes, in kindergarten. And then, if he still isn't done, then he ends up in the hallway outside the principal's office. Believe me, when we went in to school early for our conference, he actually asked we wanted a tour of the office. Very familiar territory for him, apparently.
Anyway, we're pushing him through and hoping that we can make it 8 more days. Hubba Hubba and I decided it was time to bribe him. He's working on earning a Nintendo DS. His assignemnts aren't hard and they aren't time consuming. He just needs to do them when he's supposed to....and not end up outside the principal's office.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Spring Break 2008
We loaded up and headed to our favorite city by the River, San Antonio. We stopped in Austin to visit the Texas State Museum and the Texas Headquarters for Obama. :)
The Boys couldn't wait for San Antonio....
The Boys in front of the Alamo! I love the light in this one.
The boat tour was a great way for The Boys to see the entire Riverwalk and scope out places to visit.
The Boys at night on the Riverwalk. Cute. Cute.
DeRusha's meet SHAMU! Just ignore the lady who looks like she's meeting midgets. I was trying to get away from his weird-o head thing.
Manatee workout. No really, he's doing sit ups!
MY FAVORITE of the whole trip. That was one helluva a margarita-Everything is bigger in Texas!!
ALL3
The Boys couldn't wait for San Antonio....
The Boys in front of the Alamo! I love the light in this one.
The boat tour was a great way for The Boys to see the entire Riverwalk and scope out places to visit.
The Boys at night on the Riverwalk. Cute. Cute.
DeRusha's meet SHAMU! Just ignore the lady who looks like she's meeting midgets. I was trying to get away from his weird-o head thing.
Manatee workout. No really, he's doing sit ups!
MY FAVORITE of the whole trip. That was one helluva a margarita-Everything is bigger in Texas!!
ALL3
Do you see this couple?
Well, I had forgotten what joy we had with each other. No, seriously. I really did let the day-to-day grind get in the way. Here and there, with a stop at the dry cleaners on the way, I was running around trying to keep everything in balance and I forgot. We have always been one of those couples that knows when we aren't in balance. It just doesn't feel right to not be on the same page. There would be the occasional stage when one of us would have to bookmark the spot and let the other catch up, but we had always managed to find the page in the end. And so, yesterday, we literally passed each other going through the door. I had groceries in my arms and was herding Sir Toots in the door when Hubba Hubba walked up. I rushed by and said, "Could you pick up Sweet Center from Scouts. He'll be done in about 20 minutes." And then I stopped. And thought about it...and then I said "WAIT!" I could feel his fatigue. He is oh so tired of waiting for me to find him. So tired of being bossed around and directed about. So, I leaned over and kissed him. Bookmark that spot, baby.
Gag, I'm done. :)
Friday, March 14, 2008
Okay...Just a couple more...
They are amazing....I just have to share a couple more:
How HUGE does he look??
Ask him how old he is...go ahead....he'll tell you 5andahalfandthreequarters
Sorry they are crooked, I'm still trying to figure out my scanner!
I'm off to play outside!
How HUGE does he look??
Ask him how old he is...go ahead....he'll tell you 5andahalfandthreequarters
Sorry they are crooked, I'm still trying to figure out my scanner!
I'm off to play outside!
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
No apologies
for taking so long to get back into blogging.... :)
I just want to share a picture of My Boys. They have been so busy and I have only just now begun to catch up with them from my travels!! I'm so glad to be home and settling back into our life.
I just want to share a picture of My Boys. They have been so busy and I have only just now begun to catch up with them from my travels!! I'm so glad to be home and settling back into our life.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
still struggling
Today I received 3 calls from the school. Sir Toots is still struggling with this thing we call kindergarten. I have no idea what to do at this point. He's lost privileges and he says he understands...but clearly he doesn't. They want to do this Scared Straight thing and take him on a tour of the school for troubled kids here in the district. I'm not quite sure this will help him. I don't think that at 5 he will understand why he's there. and truthfully, I don't want it to backfire and have him WANT to go there.
My friend, who's a special ed teacher, thinks that this is a terrible idea. She is going to bring me some Behavior Charts from her school. Not the ones they use on the crazies...just the normal ones. I'm going to make a case that we need to try some real positive enforcement and see what that gets us.
Fortunately, Sweet Center is still the model of a perfect student. :) His Cub Scout Pinewood Derby is this weekend. He and Hubba Hubba have been working feverishly on this little car. You'd think it was going to be an Indy 500 Car. I love to watch them work on it. The fumes of the paint alone are enough to keep me out of range...but they are having so much fun! I promise to get pictures of the race and post them for everyone.
By the way, as part of my New Year's Revolution to enjoy my life more, I have started a Glog (a gratitude blog) and if you are at all interested in the menial things that make me smile...feel free to check it out here. I have been made fun of for this...so please spare me the witty barbs. You don't have to click it...I just like actually putting it down when something happens that makes me appreciate this life I live, breath, and love everyday.
My friend, who's a special ed teacher, thinks that this is a terrible idea. She is going to bring me some Behavior Charts from her school. Not the ones they use on the crazies...just the normal ones. I'm going to make a case that we need to try some real positive enforcement and see what that gets us.
Fortunately, Sweet Center is still the model of a perfect student. :) His Cub Scout Pinewood Derby is this weekend. He and Hubba Hubba have been working feverishly on this little car. You'd think it was going to be an Indy 500 Car. I love to watch them work on it. The fumes of the paint alone are enough to keep me out of range...but they are having so much fun! I promise to get pictures of the race and post them for everyone.
By the way, as part of my New Year's Revolution to enjoy my life more, I have started a Glog (a gratitude blog) and if you are at all interested in the menial things that make me smile...feel free to check it out here. I have been made fun of for this...so please spare me the witty barbs. You don't have to click it...I just like actually putting it down when something happens that makes me appreciate this life I live, breath, and love everyday.
Monday, January 14, 2008
Travels
When Mama travels, she falls off the blogging wagon. Sorry for not keeping ya'll updated on The Boys. They are being really good for Hubba Hubba and behaving themselves while I'm away training. Last week San Antonio and this week St. Louis.
Sir Toots was like a suction cup this past weekend and didn't want to let me out of his sight. Sweet Center is so "whatever..you're home...that's nice...fix me some food."
Now, I'm gone again and though I just left this morning, I'm ready to be home with my men. I finished laundry in time to catch my flight and I was off again!
I'll be back with pictures and such soon.
Sir Toots was like a suction cup this past weekend and didn't want to let me out of his sight. Sweet Center is so "whatever..you're home...that's nice...fix me some food."
Now, I'm gone again and though I just left this morning, I'm ready to be home with my men. I finished laundry in time to catch my flight and I was off again!
I'll be back with pictures and such soon.
Thursday, January 03, 2008
New Year's Revolution
The only thing that I really, really want to do this year is:
ENJOY LIFE MORE!!
yes, I'll stay on my meds (Hubba Hubba will appreciate this, I'm sure) and I'll still do the laundry and make sure that there are clean bowls in the cupboard for breakfast, but I want to do it with a spirit that sees the enjoyment in the actual act of living.
Please don't think that hoakey. I have really begun to see how precious my life is and short of rolling around in the green grass of goodness that I have so undeservedly been given, I can try and appreciate it spiritually, mentally, and physically.
So, see the irony there? Something that seems so small, really isn't.
Happy New Year to you and yours!
ENJOY LIFE MORE!!
yes, I'll stay on my meds (Hubba Hubba will appreciate this, I'm sure) and I'll still do the laundry and make sure that there are clean bowls in the cupboard for breakfast, but I want to do it with a spirit that sees the enjoyment in the actual act of living.
Please don't think that hoakey. I have really begun to see how precious my life is and short of rolling around in the green grass of goodness that I have so undeservedly been given, I can try and appreciate it spiritually, mentally, and physically.
So, see the irony there? Something that seems so small, really isn't.
Happy New Year to you and yours!
Monday, December 31, 2007
Flickr
I have a ton to learn about this wacky internet thing....but I managed to upload some Christmas pictures:
Check them out here!
and I've added a button on the right that lets you get there anytime you wish!
Check them out here!
and I've added a button on the right that lets you get there anytime you wish!
Sunday, December 30, 2007
The Attempt
We tried to take pictures of The Boys for Christmas. Here's what happened:
and after several tries, here's how impatient they got:
If we promised you pictures for Christmas, please bear with us....They will be coming in the New Year. From a professional photographer.
and after several tries, here's how impatient they got:
If we promised you pictures for Christmas, please bear with us....They will be coming in the New Year. From a professional photographer.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Good News!
I have a job! Well, technically I start my job on Jan 7th. I'm really excited about it! I'll be working with 6 clinics in North Texas that provide services to amputees and others who need prosthetics. My technical title is Business Development Manager- fancy, huh? Really it just means that day to day I will be working with the Practice Managers and physicians to increase business. It will be very cool and I think, more importantly, that it will be a job that makes a difference to people. I will be working closely with new amputees and getting them the assistance and services that they need.
Personally, it means that I will in a challenging environment and I'm looking forward to that after this past year. I'm so ready to say good-bye to 2007! Good things happened and yet there were limits on what we were able to do as a family because of the time I spent soul-searching for a career that would allow me to use my health care knowledge and still feel like I was making a difference. I have done so many personality profiles and spent so much time pondering different avenues of work, that I'm sick of myself and being inside my own head.
I can't say 07 was a total waste for me. I started to practice meditation and I studied Buddhism. I read some of the Dalai Lama's teachings and learned that ultimately I have to learn to live a balance between my religious upbringing and what I believe today. It's not the same, nor is it so different that I am willing to convert to a new religion. I'm still intrigued by the possibility of studying a balance between zazen zen and christianity. This may seem a contradiction since the purpose of zazen is to reach a Buddha state, but I believe there are nuggets in all manifestations that will serve me well in this life to ultimately live in service for others.
I'm trying to teach Sweet Center how to spend a little time each day in meditation. I didn't make a big announcement about it, but Hubba Hubba and I decided to take him off his ADHD medication over the Thanksgiving break for a little while. He's been on some form of medication since he was 5 years old and we thought it would be worthwhile to see how he was without for a few days when he would just be home with us. I have to say that the past month has been wonderful for him. His personality is really starting to POP! and he's not having any issues at school that are outside the norm for a 10 year-old boy. We're teaching him to recognize when he's getting amped up and some basic self-control techniques to pull him back down from hyperactivity. It appears to be working. I learned a few things from the shrink that I met with about Sir Toots. He told me it was okay to give kids a break from medication and allow them to fully experience the range and intensity of their emotions. Hubba Hubba and I just wanted to make sure that Sweet Center just knew how to self-moderate so he wouldn't get in trouble at school or playing with friends. I still can't take them both to the grocery store, but what mother really can take 2 kids into a place that is supposed to overload your senses and hope to come out sane?
As for Sir Toots, we are holding off on making any decisions until later in 2008. I want to get him through kindergarten and then look at his behaviors. He's actually doing quite well right now, so I will keep my fingers crossed and hope for the best when they return to school in January. We have some date nights planned and I so hope that the one-on-one times will help both of The Boys. He's still learning what' acceptable behavior in school so I think cutting him a little slack isn't such a bad idea.
Hubba Hubba and I are planning a get away to our favorite city, San Antonio, for sometime in late February. I have to do quite a bit of travel in January for my new job, and it just makes sense to plan something now for our anniversary. 11 years. How many of you can believe that?!?
2007 taught me many things, but ultimately I learned that no matter what I do or how hair brained an idea I cook up, I will always have the love of Hubba Hubba to catch me when I fall or fly. There's no better lesson learned than that.
Personally, it means that I will in a challenging environment and I'm looking forward to that after this past year. I'm so ready to say good-bye to 2007! Good things happened and yet there were limits on what we were able to do as a family because of the time I spent soul-searching for a career that would allow me to use my health care knowledge and still feel like I was making a difference. I have done so many personality profiles and spent so much time pondering different avenues of work, that I'm sick of myself and being inside my own head.
I can't say 07 was a total waste for me. I started to practice meditation and I studied Buddhism. I read some of the Dalai Lama's teachings and learned that ultimately I have to learn to live a balance between my religious upbringing and what I believe today. It's not the same, nor is it so different that I am willing to convert to a new religion. I'm still intrigued by the possibility of studying a balance between zazen zen and christianity. This may seem a contradiction since the purpose of zazen is to reach a Buddha state, but I believe there are nuggets in all manifestations that will serve me well in this life to ultimately live in service for others.
I'm trying to teach Sweet Center how to spend a little time each day in meditation. I didn't make a big announcement about it, but Hubba Hubba and I decided to take him off his ADHD medication over the Thanksgiving break for a little while. He's been on some form of medication since he was 5 years old and we thought it would be worthwhile to see how he was without for a few days when he would just be home with us. I have to say that the past month has been wonderful for him. His personality is really starting to POP! and he's not having any issues at school that are outside the norm for a 10 year-old boy. We're teaching him to recognize when he's getting amped up and some basic self-control techniques to pull him back down from hyperactivity. It appears to be working. I learned a few things from the shrink that I met with about Sir Toots. He told me it was okay to give kids a break from medication and allow them to fully experience the range and intensity of their emotions. Hubba Hubba and I just wanted to make sure that Sweet Center just knew how to self-moderate so he wouldn't get in trouble at school or playing with friends. I still can't take them both to the grocery store, but what mother really can take 2 kids into a place that is supposed to overload your senses and hope to come out sane?
As for Sir Toots, we are holding off on making any decisions until later in 2008. I want to get him through kindergarten and then look at his behaviors. He's actually doing quite well right now, so I will keep my fingers crossed and hope for the best when they return to school in January. We have some date nights planned and I so hope that the one-on-one times will help both of The Boys. He's still learning what' acceptable behavior in school so I think cutting him a little slack isn't such a bad idea.
Hubba Hubba and I are planning a get away to our favorite city, San Antonio, for sometime in late February. I have to do quite a bit of travel in January for my new job, and it just makes sense to plan something now for our anniversary. 11 years. How many of you can believe that?!?
2007 taught me many things, but ultimately I learned that no matter what I do or how hair brained an idea I cook up, I will always have the love of Hubba Hubba to catch me when I fall or fly. There's no better lesson learned than that.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Say You Want a Revolution...Yeah Yeah....
Talking with Sweet Center about the upcoming New Year. The usual stuff about making positive changes and what kind of things we can do for 2008.
Sweet Center:"Let's make a New Year's Revolution to take a lunch to school every day, except Fridays because that's when they have square pizza."
Me: "A Revolution, huh?"
Sweet Center: "Yea, ya know....a real revolution that we can keep."
Sweet Center:"Let's make a New Year's Revolution to take a lunch to school every day, except Fridays because that's when they have square pizza."
Me: "A Revolution, huh?"
Sweet Center: "Yea, ya know....a real revolution that we can keep."
Saturday, December 08, 2007
well, hello there gorgeous.... come here often?
yes, I'm totally slacking on keeping everyone updated on our household. But, I must admit that I am finding my time away from the computer very fun. I have really learned to throw a pass perfectly to Sweet Center. I'm thinking of changing his name to Sweet Hands. He's that good of receiver. Also, I've been talking with Sir Toot's teacher about his howling. Yes, howling. Our devilish little one has started to amuse himself in the restroom by howling. Evidently while, ahhem, taking care of business, he gets bored. And not having a book around to occupy his mind, he has taken to howling in the hallowed kindergarten communal potty. (Sorry, that was just a fun sentence to write!) Anyway, we discussed this and he has agreed to maybe work on his numbers or ABC's quietly instead of attracting the attention of the entire pod community.
As for my job search...things are well. It's less than 3 weeks until Christmas and I could possibly get my wish! I have a very important interview next week!! And I have a second interview for something that looks really interesting. Both could be challenging in their own unique ways. Hubba Hubba and I are talking about options and what we think of both things. I know what would be best long term for us and so I have a leaning , but I will focus on the positive and appreciate where I am right now. It's been almost an entire year since I was employed at what Hubba Hubba refers to as a "real job" and so I'm looking forward to it!
I must say, I'm so blessed with my ole' man. When we talked the other night and started parsing out each opportunity, he wasn't concerned that one didn't pay as much as the other. No siree...Hubba Hubba looked me right in the eye and asked, "Okay, but which would you enjoy more? I want you to do something that means more to you." Now folks, this man hasn't seen a real paycheck from me in neigh' on 11 months, and he isn't concerned about me just taking any ole' job. He wants me to take the one that I will enjoy. Regardless of the money. Could I get an "Amen" for that classy show of support?
And the country twang is gone and we are backed to my usual breathless ramblings....Please don't think that I'm counting any chickens before they hatch. I know I could go on each of these upcoming interviews and totally burp and fart my way through. But, I know that something good is coming. So, I'm going to keep believing and studying and prepping until I get an offer letter. :)
Now, I have had a few of you ask about my teaching plans. Well, I should say that I decided there wasn't really a reason for us to shell out 40 grand to work on my master's and then graduate to make 40 grand a year. But really, my time at the preschool taught me that I don't want to be locked in a room with 21 children all day unable to go to the bathroom whenever I wanted.
I have found something to do that will enable me to still work with kiddos and be involved with The Boys. When I signed up Sweet Center back in October for Boy Scouts, I filled out the form for Adult Volunteers. I assumed that I needed to fill it out if I planned on going on any camping trips or whatnot. Evidently you only fill out the VOLUNTEER form if you plan on volunteering to actively participate in the Pack. Hmm...who knew? Anyway, I was put on the committee and have been participating in the routine stuff. I have loved it! Not the uniform, though. I have resisted that with every fiber of my being! Have you seen the thing? It's really not my style. Anyway, the big ticket to all this is that Sweet Center has enjoyed me doing this with him. So the Cubmaster of his Pack has asked me to serve as Committee Chairperson. I'm going to meet with her next week to discuss the role and responsibilities in more detail. It's a huge undertaking, but it really will be fun to be this involved with something that Sweet Center so enjoys. Really, I don't have that much time before he's done with totally wanting to spend time with me. I have to jump at the chance while I can! And next year, Sir Toots can join us. By then, I will probably have a uniform, too. But, I swear I'm wearing some little camo cargo capris or something. I can't do the officially sanctioned pants. *shudder*
Okay, I think that's it. If you are still with me on this rambling episode, thanks for taking the time! :)
As for my job search...things are well. It's less than 3 weeks until Christmas and I could possibly get my wish! I have a very important interview next week!! And I have a second interview for something that looks really interesting. Both could be challenging in their own unique ways. Hubba Hubba and I are talking about options and what we think of both things. I know what would be best long term for us and so I have a leaning , but I will focus on the positive and appreciate where I am right now. It's been almost an entire year since I was employed at what Hubba Hubba refers to as a "real job" and so I'm looking forward to it!
I must say, I'm so blessed with my ole' man. When we talked the other night and started parsing out each opportunity, he wasn't concerned that one didn't pay as much as the other. No siree...Hubba Hubba looked me right in the eye and asked, "Okay, but which would you enjoy more? I want you to do something that means more to you." Now folks, this man hasn't seen a real paycheck from me in neigh' on 11 months, and he isn't concerned about me just taking any ole' job. He wants me to take the one that I will enjoy. Regardless of the money. Could I get an "Amen" for that classy show of support?
And the country twang is gone and we are backed to my usual breathless ramblings....Please don't think that I'm counting any chickens before they hatch. I know I could go on each of these upcoming interviews and totally burp and fart my way through. But, I know that something good is coming. So, I'm going to keep believing and studying and prepping until I get an offer letter. :)
Now, I have had a few of you ask about my teaching plans. Well, I should say that I decided there wasn't really a reason for us to shell out 40 grand to work on my master's and then graduate to make 40 grand a year. But really, my time at the preschool taught me that I don't want to be locked in a room with 21 children all day unable to go to the bathroom whenever I wanted.
I have found something to do that will enable me to still work with kiddos and be involved with The Boys. When I signed up Sweet Center back in October for Boy Scouts, I filled out the form for Adult Volunteers. I assumed that I needed to fill it out if I planned on going on any camping trips or whatnot. Evidently you only fill out the VOLUNTEER form if you plan on volunteering to actively participate in the Pack. Hmm...who knew? Anyway, I was put on the committee and have been participating in the routine stuff. I have loved it! Not the uniform, though. I have resisted that with every fiber of my being! Have you seen the thing? It's really not my style. Anyway, the big ticket to all this is that Sweet Center has enjoyed me doing this with him. So the Cubmaster of his Pack has asked me to serve as Committee Chairperson. I'm going to meet with her next week to discuss the role and responsibilities in more detail. It's a huge undertaking, but it really will be fun to be this involved with something that Sweet Center so enjoys. Really, I don't have that much time before he's done with totally wanting to spend time with me. I have to jump at the chance while I can! And next year, Sir Toots can join us. By then, I will probably have a uniform, too. But, I swear I'm wearing some little camo cargo capris or something. I can't do the officially sanctioned pants. *shudder*
Okay, I think that's it. If you are still with me on this rambling episode, thanks for taking the time! :)
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