Special Contribution

Love this!



Hubba Hubba's sister created it in homage to our wedding march- The Star Wars Theme Song. No, not the Darth Vader song. This is the "real" theme song.

I look over at the man I've just promised to spend the rest of my life with and he's signaling to his buddies in the back of the chapel. I'm trying to figure out what's going on and as we're introduced as 'Mr. and Mrs. DeRusha' the freackin' Star Wars theme song comes on.

Now really, how could we not succeed after a beginning like that?

BTW, I believe the X is for 10 not because we're x rated or anything. But, if it quacks like a duck and looks like a duck....

Wow- Hubba Hubba has a big head

oh, did I just write that? Damn, I meant to say he has big toes. I think it's the Bond in him. Anyway, I was just on my fabulous sister in law's site and she has the picture up of Hubba Hubba and I. His head looks huge next to mine! It's the same picture I have on this blog, but I never noticed the circumference ratio before. I look like this sweet petite thing and truly that's a stretch. There's no truth in advertising 'round these parts! Maybe that's why I like the picture. That or the fact that we are both looking in the same direction. :)
As for Hubba Hubba, I don't think he can take a bad picture. Never in 12 years have I seen that man look horrendous when the camera captures him. Damn! That's what ticks me off about him. He's very pretty. But, really I do like it.

And? He's lucky. I mean like super freakin' lucky. I like that, too because I get to be a beneficiary of his luckiness. Like when the company he was working for just shut down his department down one day. That sucker had a great new job within a week! A week, I tell you! That's not normal!

Plus! He really he can't find clothes that don't look good on him. That is so irritating! I can't find decent jeans to save my soul and he has like 4 pairs that actually do justice to his backside.

Anyway, I figure he's a good catch. Even with his big head.

***Yes, that's a blatant plug on my SILs site. It's very good and you should check it out. Although, I think we have the same readership. but, if not....check it out. It's fun and free.
And if you have come here from her site, please just know that the philosophy behind this blog is that there really isn't one. It's pretty random stuff that I put out here, but you are welcome to comment and share your own thoughts. I babble about The Boys, Hubba Hubba and other things that pertain to us. Perhaps you will enjoy peering into our life.

Neat Site

http://www.imagechef.com

One of these days I'm actually going to get my interactive guru man to show me how to create links. I can manage pictures though, so that's something. Anyway, this site gives you a template and then you just drop in your name or message and you get this great little design.

Here's an example of something I whipped up:



How cute is that?
Go on, go out and play. It'll be good for you!

6 points and 3 rebounds

I have to give a quick shout out to Sweet Center and his basketball team, the Spurs. His team played their collective hearts out this weekend and they lost their basketball game in overtime to the #1 ranked team in our division. It was a hell of a sight to see him producing on both ends of the court! I missed seeing his two free throws, but it was the amazing thing to see a group of 8 and 9 year olds get their adrenaline on and push themselves beyond what they ever thought possible. Our coach this season has been hell bent on teaching them some solid fundamentals and creating a real team. So far it's worked amazingly well.

Look our Fury, we're coming after you in the finals! No referee is going to steal the second game from us, no matter who your coach is. :)

9 years 354 days and counting....

Our 10th anniversary is almost here. No, I'm not getting my big ole' fat party (remember, I did just quit my job) and so we have reached a compromise. We are putting a cd together. Like you used to do in high school when you had a mad crush on the boy in your math class and you just couldn't bear to be rejected and so all that teenage angst was put to use by making a mixed tape. Oh, wait, was that just me?
Anyway, Hubba Hubba and I are trying to create an album that encapsulates our relationship. I called dibs on Maddona "Like a Virgin" and Hubba Hubba told me that he wasn't sure that would spell love to people who will get the album, you know, like his mother. Damn, honey, we played that song at our wedding. He looked me and said, "yes, well, we didn't think you would still be around so it was okay to let you have a little fun then." I'm kidding, he didn't really say that. But, some of the people at our wedding thought it. Fortunately we've weathered a lot the last 10 years and we still get crazy mad googly eyes with each other. And I still insist on being his first kiss when he comes home in the evening. Don't laugh, I've had to shove children out of the way to make this happen some days!
Anyway, I know that several of you read this blog and don't comment, but I would so appreciate any ideas, thoughts, suggestions on songs that you think we should include on this album. We want to mail them out next weekend so that they actually arrive before our anniversary. So, please leave a comment or drop me an email (mrsderusha@gmail.com) if you have a suggestion. Or even a silly story to share that somehow involves us within the last 12 years because I need inspiration for the artwork that will accompany said album.

By the way, we had our preanniversary dinner this past weekend and had so much fun talking about how important many of you have been to us on this journey. We've had many good memories over the years and I'm not sure that just mailing you a cd will allow you to get that, but it's cheaper than a party and so it will have to do for now. :)

Toxic

Driving in the car today I heard the Britney song "Toxic" (yes, dear Internet, this means I need new music, I know this!) and I got to thinking about people in our lives that are toxic. Like the mom who recently shamed Sweet Center and others like her who feel the need to impose their negative outlook on our lives.

Because I love Google, I went straight to the source to ferret out solutions for dealing with toxic people and landed at so many sites that have various suggestions and solutions for dealing with these people that I just gave up trying to capture a picture or definition of this particular type of person. I figure that I know it when I see and experience it. And Hubba Hubba is really good at laying down the boundaries and saying NO when somebody is out of whack. He's really good at this, in fact. And he doesn't have the girly hang ups that I do. I worry that someone will get mad at me and how I will interact with them. He looks at me with that totally impatient look he only pulls out when I'm being an ass and says,"They're gonna be mad at you anyway, why let them control you?"

If you know me at all then you know I work to overcome my "foot in mouth syndrome" on a daily basis. This is the ability I have perfected to just spurt out whatever comes to mind. As I've gotten older I have really learned to question my motives for just saying whatever. I'm learning and getting better at reining myself in. Usually. Unfortunately I still have the tendency and it's hard to overcome sometimes. Like the other day, I felt it necessary to stand up for my sister. Well, yes she is a grown woman, and yes she is the oldest, but she's so darn nice that she doesn't always get what she wants because she's worried about hurting someone's feelings. I shoot first and then think about the other person. Does this make me a toxic person? I desperately hope not. And I know that this is in direct conflict with my fear that people will get mad at me. But, I'm beginning to think that maybe it isn't at all. Perhaps my fear of others anger is a result of opening my mouth for so many years and the fallout that inevitably resulted.

But, I'm learning. I'm learning about myself and learning that my past behaviors can't control today. And, as Hubba Hubba would asks why should it control me?

Why indeed?

Thursday Thirteen

13 Things I love about my new job:

13: No commute or spending all day in the car
12: I can go work out after The Boys are at school or on my midday break and no one cares
11: Being able to listen to The Ticket on the radio- funny sports channel that entertains and informs- all day (This is different then my New Year's resolution b/c this is funny stuff!)
10: Knowing that if I want to get paid, I have to work- this means that I get paid for what I accomplish, not just what some random computer program decides to dispense to me for my bonus.
9: Lunching with girlfriends whenever they have the time- my schedule no matter rules since I won't be on the other side of town when they are available.
8: Not wearing a suit! and the dry cleaning bill drops by half!
7: Being able to go to the grocery store in the middle of the day and thus not having to worry about crowds and yelling children
6: Walking to lunch in the other room
5: Knowing that I can pick up The Boys at 4pm and that my work day is done- if I want it to be
4: Petting Pep as I talk on the phone
3: Learning something new
2: It's not in healthcare!
1: The joy that comes from jumping off the cliff and knowing that it will only work if I work it!

That's the sound of 3 Boys exhaling....

The stress level in our house just dropped by about 20+ points because a decision has just finally been made and Mama's not doing 2 things at once anymore. I figure that puts us right above 'Normal' and somewhere below 'Crazy'.

That's right, boys and girls, I quit my job today. YEA!! I don't want to get into the specifics of what led me to this decision, but I do want to say that 2007 is going to be a good year for our family! No more relying on other people to decide what to pay me, now I work and then I get paid for what I produce. It's a big decision and one that we have been bouncing around for a few months. Hubba Hubba and I finally sat down this past weekend and punched in some numbers. It will work!~ and it will allow me to spend more time with The Boys.

I'm very excited! and I have to say a huge Thank You to Hubba Hubba for believing that I can do this! Or in his words, 'if I didn't believe you could do it then I never would have let you try'. :) That's faith! or something. But this should be fun!

February 4, 2007

GO COLTS!!! GO COLTS!!!
Look out Miami! The good ole' Colts are coming to take over the town! Look out Bears, you're tickets up and your quarterback will be exposed for the JV player that he is. :)

Now I just have to get Hubba Hubba moving on the hi def! I really need to see the look in Joseph Addai's eyes as he crosses the goal line!! Yes, we live in the city of America's Team, but we're really from Indianapolis and have hoped for this day for Tony Dungy and Peyton Manning for the last several years. Well, I should say that I just finally got Hubba Hubba on the football bandwagon this year. He was a freak last night when time ran out and we realized that Tom Brady wasn't going to make it happen for the Patriots. I don't believe he jumped that high when his children were born. :)


*** Some of you may recall that Miami is the city that ripped out our hearts last year during the NBA Finals- Please, dear God, let this be a sweet trip. *** I promise to let Sweet Center rewind every single Peyton Manning commercial that comes on without complaining, for at least 6 months, if we can watch THE INDIANAPOLIS COLTS win the SUPER BOWL!!

No, The Stepford's no longer live at this address

Change is in the air around here. I have to make a major decision and at the same time make sure that Hubba Hubba is on board with the new status. I'm excited about the opportunities, but I know that he's not the risk taker that I am and he just wants to make sure that we will be able to feed The Boys and still put shoes on their feet. Hey, no problem there. I like shoes on my feet, too. Oh, and food. I really like food. I just like shoes a lot more. But, The Boys, I understand, they gotta eat. So, I'll keep plugging in the numbers and trying to figure out what I can do to make this a rational and responsible change. We'll see what's in store over the next few weeks. I just want to be in control of my future and feel that my contribution is worth all the work and time.

As for The Boys, we met with Sweet Center's teacher yesterday. Can I tell you how much I love this woman? I don't think we have ever had a teacher who totally "gets" him and what kind of kid he really is. It's so amazing to hear her say that she sees his tender side and understands his thinking process in the classroom. Pass some of that understanding this way, please because I don't understand his thinking process at home! :) Luckily she got the joke and told me that he just needs a little more attention and direction in the classroom, but that's he is so smart that sometimes it's frustrating for both of them. Evidently the whole gist of the problem is that Sweet Center just wants to finish. No particular reason why. He just wants to be done and on to the next thing, whatever it may be. So, this means that he's not reading the directions and being really sloppy when he does complete the work. I figure this means that he's destined to be a physician, but I don't think that will really happen if he has to repeat the 3rd grade! I hear medical schools are still picky about grades and those kinds of things. Anywhoo, our solution is to offer up rewards at home that will get his juices flowing. He is responsible for accurately completing his work and then having his teacher sign his calendar at the end of the day. If he gets a check and a + then he's given a 30 minute reward on one of his gaming systems at home. If not, then no games and no TV. (I gues this reward would make sense if you knew that Hubba Hubba and I don't currently allow any games or TV (except Mavs games) during the school week- See we feel that deprivation is the best way to make them tow the line.) A wonderful friend of mine suggested that we actually reward him and see what that gets us. It's a totally great idea and the fact that neither one of us thought of it means that we are so not qualified for this job!

As for Sir Toots.....well....as his Auntie Zeus says, 'he's an island unto himself.' I talked to his teacher about cutting him slack on his current shortage of the 'urge to please' in the classroom. I mean, really I get it. I know he needs to behave and be kind and say 'Please' and 'Thank you' at the appropriate times, but can we please remember that we're not raising the Stepford Clan? Hubba Hubba and I have talked with him and role played (yes, we really do the cheesy role play thing in our house) on how to get along with others. He knows what he needs to do. Being four and all just sometimes gets in the way. But, have no fear...we are on the lookout for his Urge to Please. If you find it, please return it. It really would be nice to have a totally compliant glassy eyed child in the house. Maybe the toy room would stay clean. :)



Stay warm outside! It's a frickin' ridiculous 37 degrees here! I think someone needs to remind ole' Mother Nature that this is Texas- not Wisconsin.

in 48 short hours

I had to head out of town for business. Gone less then 48 hours (roughly) and we have trouble on The Boy Front. I got a call on my drive back today from Sweet Center's teacher. Still having problems with the school work. Discussion ensues and I learn that he has detention this afternoon. For pure laziness and not taking his time on actually completing the assignment in a readable manner. Nice, but not a new problem. We'll have a meeting with her tomorrow after school to discuss with Sweet Center how really and totally important it is to do a good job. Hopefully problem solved by this time tomorrow.

As for Sir Toots, I walk in the door and see a note on the counter that contains phrases such as, 'just thought you would like to know' and 'what can we do to fix this?' The killer phrase was, "He has lost his urge to please." This means what? He's four, for crying out loud. I have no idea how to fix this. And why now? Please tell me this is a phase. A phase that came up within the last 48 hours and will be gone within the next 48.

Four is fabulous

I'm getting ready to be out of town for the next 3 days. No big deal, just the usual quarterly company meeting. But, this is the first time that Sir Toots has expressed any sort of trepidation to me traveling. When we talked about it last night hIs eyes popped and asked if I was ever coming back. Huge brown eyes looking at me like he couldn't believe that I would dare contemplate taking off into the wide blue yonder. After I assured him that I would be returning in plenty of time to get him off to school on Friday, he was much better. Promising to pick him up early made it even better.

I spent a little extra time getting him into bed. It was so nice to just lay in his bed with him and listen to him talk. He's finally at the age where he can remember things. Even if his sense of time is off, like talking about Papaw accidently cutting a hole in his blue and yellow pants "last night." Well, Sir Toots, I believe that happened when he was here at Christmas. Papaw was putting your air hockey table together and you got too close when you were trying to help. Do you remember that? He concentrates for a minute and then slowly looks at me and grins. "No, but your butts on fire!"

It's time for the botox treatments to begin.

Me picking up Sir Toots from daycare. He asks me to tie his shoe and when I bend down to his feet he points at my face.

Funny look on his face and he tells me "stop squishing them together."

"What are you talking about? My eyes? My eyes aren't closed."

"No Mom, right here."

And he leans in and puts his little chubby finger on the wrinkles that I have developed on my forehead since I had children and curls his lip at me. Like I'm old or something.

oh Sweet Center....

If you know him, then you know how tender his heart is and how I actually came to nickname him "Sweet Center" instead of just calling him "Messy Curly Haired Kid Who Like to Play Basketball".
So, we had an issue with a mother who was not so nice to him a few weeks ago. Sweet Center was rude to her kid and she was rude back to Sweet Center. I believe her exact words to me were, "I know that it was harsh, but I felt like he was being harsh to my kid and so that's just the way it is." To which I said, "Huh, I thought we were the parents and the responsible ones who were supposed to model adult behavior for our children". I didn't say this out loud, but I thought it and it helped me put her behavior into perspective. Unfortunately her kid is in Sweet Center's class at school. So not only is this kid around the corner from us, but Sweet Center has to see him everyday at school. Well, no wonder I got a call from the school yesterday that Sweet Center didn't feel good. He's not really wanted to go back to school from Christmas break and we just figured it was the typical back to school blues.

Unfortunately it's not. I got a call from his teacher today and we talked for a long time about how he's failed every paper he's turned in over the last two weeks. I mentioned the situation from over the holidays and she told me that she saw Sweet Center talking to this kid last week but they wouldn't tell her what it was about. I can't imagine how hard this must be on him. He is so sensitive and I imagine he's having a hard time seeing this kid since he was so embarrassed by his mother. So, Sweet Center is rushing through his paperwork to go to the bathroom and get on with his day. It's almost like he thinks if he rushes then his day will be over and he can come home.

Really, I can't understand this. I'm not that sensitive or nice. I don't know where this kid gets his sensitive spirit. It's absolutely beatiful and Hubba Hubba and I try to nurture it, but I don't always get it. I always figured that if other kids didn't like me them then screw 'em. I was fortunate in that I always had friends and didn't really suffer from any sort social phobias. Not that I was ever elected Ms. Popularity, but I never worried about other people and their opinions of me.

So, I'm thinking that I have to figure out some serious mom-empathy to help him through this. I can't talk to the mother since she's the one who created this situation. I'm not sure that she would actually rise to the occassion and do the right thing. At this point, we just have to move on. I just need to know how to help him do that.

Gosh, this whole parenting thing is hard. But, I wouldn't trade it to be a kid again.

A Good Man is Hard to Find....

Unless you get really really lucky! Fortunately I held onto mine and now I get to celebrate his awesomeness every January 9th.



Happy Birthday to Hubba Hubba!!

Thursday Thirteen

New Year's Resolutions:
(I have no idea if I really have 13, but here goes nothing....)

13. Wake up in time to really get a good breakfast on the table. Cold cereal is so 2006!
12. Have The Boys bags for the day packed and ready to roll the night before- I hear this is a great time saver! I need to practice this.
11. Learn true time management- not just hopping from something to something. I would really like the calm that comes with having it all pulled together before the shit hits the fan and I get stuck in traffic staring at a bus on fire listening to a 4 year old screaming, "Your butts on fire!~"
10. Straighten my hair at least once a week. I love how this really gets Hubba Hubba excited. Man, that sounds so sad. I think he likes a different look every now and then. HHHHHHMMMMMMMM.....Maybe that takes me to
9. Role playing....but it's a family blog so I won't go there. and so back to the regularly scheduled family.....
8. Find some new and exciting incentive to get The Boys to brush twice a day. I need them to understand that once a day doesn't really cut it.
7. Find a new favorite song that really makes me move when I am being all crabby. Any suggestions, oh Internet? My taste are varied and I really need to expand my horizons beyond just what is on the radio.
6. Buy real furniture and really organize my office. I plan on pulling some Feng Shui into the mix. Hopefully this will help with...
5. Enjoying my job. Whether it's with my current employer or a new challenge, I really want to appreciate what I have to do for 40 hours a week.
4. Not to listen to so much sports radio. I don't really need to know Dan Patrick's opinion on the whole Nick Saban mess. I mean really, does it add to my life any?
3. Show my appreciation to Hubba Hubba a little more. He knows he's special to me, but do I really show him everyday? Okay, well maybe not everyday- that would irritate the hell out of him- but perhaps just a bit more than I currently do. (Funny side note: I did a quick search to make sure I spelled irritate right and John Cleese's name came up at the top of the Yahoo page under definitions. Hubba Hubba would appreciate that.:))
2. Suck up whatever the hell is wrong with me and is causing this funny funk that I have found myself in for the last few months. Exercise much, missy? This would greatly help my attitude toward life in general. oh and a hot bath, that would be cool every now and then, too.
1. Show my love to all 3 of my boys this year in the small rituals and big excursions. I want them to know that I love this life I have and wouldn't trade it in for anything. Even new boobs and a slimmer ass.

Catch up...

Well, the packages have all been opened (except for the extras to go along with the XBOX for Hubba Hubba) and the trimmings are on their way into boxes. Hopefully all will be normal in our house by this weekend. We had an excellent holiday and it was full of love, family and sweet memories.

Sir Toots has a new thing and frequently shouts out "your butts on fire" to the nearest person. We're not exactly sure what this means, but hopefully this too shall pass, as they say. Because, really, my butts not on fire and I'm tired of checking. :)
Sweet Center enjoyed his time off from school. We had one minor altercation and he learned that adults can act like children when they don't stop and think. Seeing him cry because he made a mistake and then was humiliated for it was super hard on mom, but he's come through it okay. He was playing with a few kids and was rude to them when another boy came along that he really wanted to play with and decided to leave them. They wanted to come along and he told them no, it was just going to be him and this other kid. Ouch to them. Their mom got mad at him and instead of pointing out his mistake and how it made her boys feel, she reacted way too harshly and told him that if he was going to be that way that he couldn't come to their house and play- ever again. Yea, that's a nice thing to say to a 9 year old. Dude, he can't grasp the whole time thing waiting for his basketball game this weekend. So, I made a few calls to get the whole story and he's apologized to the boys he offended. Unfortunately you can't change time and take it back so we had to discuss how sometimes people say hurtful things and react without thinking, but really kid, you gotta include everyone when you play. Being left out is not a nice thing and it is hurtful. So, lesson learned, hopefully.

Other than that, things went super well over the holiday. I'm over my bout of pneumonia and back up and running on all cylinders. Hubba Hubba got his coveted XBOX and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I haven't lost him to an electronic mistress. I figure if I really have to drag out the lingerie and strut then I will, but I'm hoping it won't come to that. He doesn't really need those nightmares, no matter how naughty he's being!

I am so far behind on updating this thing and need to catch up. Trying to cram it all into one post isn't really fun b/c I leave out stuff. Like the sound of Pop's voice as he said grace over the Christmas meal. The sound of love covered in tears of joy was a special moment that I will cherish for the rest of my life. Surrounded by family and knowing that all is really well in the world was a magical moment that I will hold onto well past 2006. I'm trying not to look over my shoulder waiting on a smack in the face to pay me back for all my happiness.

Because, really, my butts been on fire several times over the last few days and that's enough for now.